Real Solutions Series: Dealing With Addiction

When we hear the word, ‘addiction’, most of us immediately think of drug, gambling and alcohol but there are so many other things that we can be addicted to.

Anyone of us can fall foul of addiction and many have a tendency towards addictive behaviours. They manifest in many ways. Today we see addiction to gadgets, social media, online games, food, sugar, exercise, attention, plastic surgeries, prescription medications and fame.

These addictions manifest in ways that cause people to be out of touch with reality, gain or lose excessive weights, have physical, emotional and mental health issues; others don’t live the life that they could have because the addiction robs them of their dreams, passions, energy, time and money.

Many create fake personas because of their craving for fame and attention and sometimes in a bid to feed the addiction, they get into destructive patterns. Sadly some have lost their lives in the process.

Some people are addicted to the wrong emotional and physical relationships but they feel compelled to stay. Even after they escape some are drawn back to the same person or someone else with similar patterns.

For many addiction is a taboo topic because the reputation of the family is at stake. It’s understandably a conflicting and difficult time for the family who feel they did their best and wonder what they could have done differently.

The person suffering from the addiction also goes to great lengths to hide their addiction and the warning signs are often overlooked by those close to them because they want to believe things are not that bad or desperate. It’s hard to admit one’s loved one is an addict and out of control.

So what can we do?

I will be the first to say that I am not an expert but I’ve seen many overcome their addictions and living their best lives post their challenges so I know there is hope for anyone struggling with addiction.

Here are some tips that I have gleaned over the years:

Don’t deny the warning signs

Addictions happen over time and eventually people around the addict start to see warning signs. The earlier we step in, the easier the road will be.

Sometimes, the family members of the addict are distracted by the need to keep it in the family, save face or protect the addict’s relationship and job. But this backfires because all those things are at stake if the addiction progresses.

Change the lens that you see addiction through

It’s so easy to see addiction through negative lens that immediately causes us to judge the addict and blame them for their choices or make us feel guilty.

Most of us have addictive tendencies that are reflected in our choices; it could be addiction to a TV soap that we’ve never missed or to games and social media but we think nothing of it.

Addiction is addiction, the ‘drug’ or ‘thing’ of choice might just be different and costlier. Addictions are challenges we must overcome before they destroy us.

Embrace the addict – warts and all

We can’t shy away from what’s in front of us, we can’t deny or wish it away so we must embrace the person and the struggles they face. Our loved ones remain loved regardless but we mustn’t be enablers of their addiction.

The next step is to work with them to figure out potential solutions and seek the support of experts. Any solutions must include ongoing support post the addiction.

Focus on the endgame

To help an addict, we have to make some tough and often heartbreakingly painful choices. They are needed and if we lose sight of the endgame, we give in and enable the addict.

So those supporting them must ignore any feelings of guilt or shame and be willing to go the distance and follow the advice of the experts.

Hang on to hope

Never give up on the addict. As long as there is life, there is hope. Sadly and undeniably some lose the fight but many more will lose the fight if we or they lose hope. So hang on to hope and do the needful to help them. And pray for divine help.

Don’t forget to consider your own ‘innocent and supposedly nice’ addictions before you judge someone else’s bad ones.

Thanks for reading my post. Have a great week.