How Are You Living?

According to Oscar Wilde, “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people just exist.”

It begs the following questions, who are you living for? What are you living for? Why are you living? Are you living or merely existing? Answering these questions will make a difference to your quality of life taking it from mere existence to thriving.

Are you living for a greater purpose and do you find meaning in your existence? Too many times, we play roles that society, life and people thrust on us. As we go through life we take on the role of children, adolescents, adults, parents, workers and business owners etc.

Circumstances add additional labels like rich, poor, struggling, victim, unemployed, unemployable, sad, directionless, unsuccessful, widow, ex-convict, veteran, orphan, widower, divorced, broken and the list goes on.

Health challenges and diseases add even more labels that soon define us if we let them – mental health challenge, PTSD, Trauma, congenital diseases, depression, MS, CFS, Menopause, mid life crisis etc.

Too many times, we forget that these labels aren’t always permanent; many are transient. We must remind ourselves that, ‘this too shall pass’.

The circumstances will pass, the labels will change to different or better ones if we don’t give up. We are not defined by our circumstances; yes they can limit us, many present challenges to be overcome but we are more than any labels.

Who and what you live for will affect many areas of your life. As a parent, I understand those who claim to live for their children. Most parents would do anything for their children as proof of living for them but is that what they want or need from parents?

We do our children a disservice when we give up who we are, our hopes, dreams and aspirations to live only for them, making them the centre of our universe. There is a tendency for them to expect others to do the same until the real world shows them otherwise.

Living for the reasons that many people do will quite often disappoint them or not be enough. If life is lived only for children, what happens when they grow up and leave home. If life is lived only for a career, what happens when it ends?

If life has been lived only for a spouse, what happens when relationships break down or the spouse passes on?

We must live for what is eternal and not transient. We must live for what doesn’t fade or fail us. So each of us must find the answers to the meaning of life, the giver of life, the purpose of life and what we must do in return.

Lately I have found myself appreciating the moments and each day that I have. I find that I am now more comfortable dancing to beautiful music no matter where I am. While on a bus, the driver asked me what music I was listening to and I jokingly replied, the kind of music you listen to on a Friday night.

On a recent work call, I told my colleagues I spent ten minutes that morning dancing to a couple of tunes before my day started. They were surprised and found it funny. For me, this is simply about living.

One of them commented about wishing her day started that way. The fact is that her day can start that way. Yours too. We can define and choose how we want to live each day.

We can choose to be joyful in the worst of circumstances. We can take control of the changes that we need to make. We can put a distance between us the and the things that crush our souls.

We can choose to discover a higher purpose, appreciate our uniqueness and elevate the gifts that we have and use them to be a blessing to humanity. Rather than live for one person, job, family and relationship, we can choose to live for the Giver of the life that we have and for the greater good of all.

As we live for more, we end up giving more and gaining more in return.

I want to end this post with a quote from David Viscott which says, “The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The work of life is to develop it. The meaning of life is to give your gift away.”

Have a great week and thanks for reading and sharing this week’s post.